Another Year

Two times a year, New Years and my birthday,  I deeply reflect and ask myself several  questions to assist me in assessing my life's path and direction. With my birthday rapidly approaching, I have carved out time from my schedule to review and journal about the answers I am seeking. 

  • Where am I currently? (Physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually) 
  • Do I like where I am in my life right now and what can I do to improve upon it? 
  • Where I have been? (Achievements, successes, knowledge, and inner connection)
  • Is there anything I would have like to have done differently?  If so, what? 
  • Where I am going? (In the next 6 months, 1 year, 3 years and longer) 
  • What plan of action can I put in place to get over "roadblocks" and get moving on my way? 
  • Am I alignment with my life's purpose?
This year has been pivotal in shifting from a previous way of thinking and striving to a more essential way of being. I remind myself often, of the essential way of living, especially when I fall into the old patterns such as anger, sadness and negative thinking. Positive plans of action are already mapped out and I engage with them when I am, in a negative place. 

If I find myself in a negative place, I follow a simple pattern that I have used often which gets easier and easier to use each time to practice it. This may be a conversation I have with myself: 
  • "Boy I feel angry (or sad or disconnected or lonely)." 
  • "Well, I can stay in this mood or I can make a new choice and focus on something other than this." 
  • "Breathe. Connect with the moment. I feel my feel on the floor, I feel my chest moving with my deep breath, I feel myself connecting to my state of being rather than that negative emotion." 
  • "I have every right to feel angry (or sad or disconnected or lonely). I made a mistake and I felt stupid and embarrassed. I am human and making mistakes is part of being human. It is okay to make a mistake. I am okay, even though I made a mistake. I am enough, even if I make a mistake." 
  • "what can I focus on to take away the sting I feel from the self punishment I was engages in? I have some my audio book I can listen to or I can watch people here or I can go for a walk. 
  • Focusing on the present moment makes me feel better. I must have looked pretty silly being uptight about making a mistake. Laughing about it reduced the importance I placed on being perfect. All is well. I have so much to be thankful for." 
As I use this process, I am taking huge steps in breaking old patterns and old beliefs. Here is the simple break down.  
  1. Being conscious of my emotional state
  2. Allowing myself to be in that state
  3. Connect to the present moment by breathing
  4. Supporting myself and being kind to myself
  5. Changing my focus (Physically, emotionally, and mentally) to move, move me out of that negative state
  6. Staying in a positive place and connecting to the truth
When I discovered and started using this process, I was going through the process several times in an hour. Sometimes I was exhausted, but using them started shifting my awareness of the non-truths I was telling myself. When I stopped using those words and connecting to the truth, I didn't have to use the processes so much. 

It has been 10 years since I found that process. Today, I use them once in a while, because my temperament stays pretty happy these days. 


  1. I really like the conversations with yourself. I should print them and use them to remind myself when things go awry.


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